s.o.s

i've been doing a lot of NOTHING lately. yes my schedule is slowly filling itself up, especially now that i've committed myself as a stage manager for high school musical. BUT i still feel annoyingly EMPTY. not empty in a sense that i need God. it's a really weird emptiness that i get when there's nothing to do. but nowadays, it happens ever so often even when i'm soo busy at that moment. and there are so many things to do and i get it done BUT i go over it like a zombie or a robot specifically trained for menial tasks when i'm actually doing big or fun things. what's wrong with me? right now i need to finish my post lab and i haven't even started. i don't want this feeling, i need ME back. the multi-tasker extraordinaire. i'm LOST... in thought or in feelings.. i don't know... i'm drowning in unknown waters... and every time i write something a lesson or epiphany comes out and now there's nothing.. right now i need a lesson handed to me or any good word of advice. i'm finally admitting that yeah i feel alone and i need help.