antok.

antok. yan ako buong araw ngayon at kahapon. crazee. i'm tired and i'm exhausted. but i've been sleeping almost every second of this really hot day. and when i'm up for lunch, breakfast, dinner i feel sleepy. when i got out of the house to buy slurpee, i was sleepy. antok pretty much defines my whole day. and just as i started blogging, i wanna head off to bed. so that's exactly what i'm gonna do. hoping for better days. and sana, tomorrow's far better.

worked hard for this..

i looove this song.. even before it got played on the radio.. hope it doesn't get overplayed.. hmm.. i was trying to look for the lyrics, and found out that i gotta search for it under "other two" which was the original artist.. hmm...

Selfish by Sunset Daze

Someone I hate,
she think she's great unless you state the obvious.
You're next to me, entirely let's wait and see

Someone like you, selfish it's true
All you can do it's play to see entirely you disagree

No sense of reason, you think it's true
Why did you have to believe them?
No sense of reason,
What do I have to do?
There's no one else
You're deceiving

Sometimes it's true, forgiving you,
It's hard to do it's crystal clear,
(and it is) and not something
I can feel sure of

No sense of reason, you think it's true
Why did you have to believe them?
No sense of reason,
What do I have to do?
There's no one else

nakooo..

i am sooo tempted to diss summer class 'cause it truly is a bummer!! i'm missing 3 thingees with my kada and counting.. and my ateneo friends and i can't hang that much 'cause we're all working our asses off.. buuuut... i can't! i can't complain.. this has gotta work.. for some weird reason i'm half enjoying this summer semester.. fact is i have reasons to get away from things and i can zero in on my studies finally.. so ask me -> ni hao ma? well, i gotta say wo hen hao! zhende!

i just had all my notes photocopied.. i had the longest day in school.. from 7am to 5pm.. i'm sick and my voice ain't back yet.. but i'm still smiling.. guess nothing can rain on my parade now.. people say i'm blooming.. well it's cause i feel happy because i'm me.. i don't need any guy by my side to prove that.. i'm happy.. and i luuuurrrve it.. wahahahaha.. seriously, i finally got a for real 2nd chance on my college stuffy stuff and i'm sponsored 'til the end of 4th year.. i'm ssoooo glad! teehee...

so loooooovve this life you guys!! mwahuugggzzz! hehehe..

my next post would be much better.. :p

first of summer.. CLASS

ok, i decided not to take a leave and party all summer which was actually plan A.. haha.. but because i was very thankful that i'm still in Ateneo, i decided to give summer a chance... and someone did say 'school first'...

the only negative part about summer is ecology starts at 7.30 in the morning!!! and i wasn't able to take econ.. so i'm taking up foreign language, which is ok... not too negative.. i ain't bumming about the four hour break 'cause we did spend it well this morning.. sleep and DVDthon in yumi's house.. i'd be looking forward to t-th now.. hahahaha.. next time we cooK!

right now the ninjas are in za and acoy's boithday parteeeh... and here i am at home.... hahaha.. oh well, these are the sacrifices i have to make to stay in school.. and priorities need to be right once in a while.. i mean all the time.. hahaha.. although i do miss those guys, i spent a whole bunch of my short summer break with them.. lovin' it to bits..

i'm hopin' wishin' and prayin' that i'm gonna get it right this time... seriously.. i actually need this and want this... and i risked that last school year.. now that my being in Ateneo is on the line, i gotta work my butt off.. no complaints..

baCk hoMe

missing the beach already.. wish i could just go back, sit on the sand, listen to the waves, and take everything in as if it was my last.. but i know i'd always run back home..

i just came back from my tito's beach house in Paracale, Cam. Norte.. brought a few highschool friends over... namely: paola, omi (pao's cousin), gelo, floyd, fen, acoy... though we were just a small bunch, the whole trip would be listed under top1 of my most unforgettable summers LisT...

stargazing would top my list of to do's the next time i go to paracale.. hopefully bringing more friends this time.. hehe.. one new thing i did was night swim in the beach.. a new experience.. we all had our sleepless nights.. playing board games, cards, poker, watching dvds, drinking, singing karaoke, or throwing sand at each other for no reason at all.. the longer we stayed there the more we ate.. our food consumption slowly improved day by day.. :) pao managed to get herself a wee bit darker at the expense of adding to gelo's 'pagiging nognog' 'cause he was the only one up during mornings when pao planned to tan.. acoy is always crazy, running around and singing... omi is a new friend i enjoyed getting to know, guess we all did.. floyd and fen, though at most times were quiet certainly had fun too...my brothers enjoyed spending time with my crazy guy friends.. and my mom was simply fascinated by all our weird quirks.. it was all good.. it was great..

what mattered most were the talks we had.. the catching up.. the kwentos.. the 'asaran'.. the "ngiasims..." whatever that meant.. anything that strengthened the bond we already had made the trip worth while... though it was physically exhausting it was emotionally exhilarating.. i'm never gonna trade my friends for anything in this world...

the last 3 nights and 4 days i spent with the craziest bunch of friends i had reminded me that when things change it's true that they're never the same... but i doesn't only just work out in the end.. it works for the better... :)

so amazing...

Summer, winter, spring, and fall
I'll be around to catch ya calls
Cause you're my baby (you're my baby)
And I adore you
You always brighten up my day
I never ever let you wait
Cause you're my baby (you're my baby)
And you're amazing (so amazing)

on lonely summer nights...

i dream of Bali...


or any other summer get-away where i can sit and enjoy the silence and serenity of the beautiful place...

on nights when things seem so shitty and all that.. i just wanna get out...

so when you know i've bumped into nights where i feel my already crazy world crumbling some more..

i'll be in Bali.. learning to surf... or just digging my feet in the sand...

that's that..

if life is so short

i have wishes
i live on dreams
but my head, i never leave it up on the clouds...

but what if one of my prayers is on the verge of being answered
shouldn't i be jumping for joy?
but if that prayer includes me leaving a lot of things behind..
it sounds simply absurd..

yet i am very willing to accept it
with arms wide open
i want to embrace this new adventure
if it is what God wants me to do

in the end how would i know?
is this for real and why i am i so excited?

oh God.. if this is it..please give me the strength to continue
and the will to step ahead and face it with no regrets..

but if this is not what's meant to be
i hope i accept it with a happy heart
and still a willing spirit...

'cause i've lost a lot of hope
remaining stagnant emotionally, physically...
and i was thinking, a change would give me new meaning..

i'll listen..
i'm just your daughter
waiting for an answer..

recap.

mar31..
my bro's (ezra) graduation from 6th grade.. my BIG little brother is off to highschool.. man, i'm getting old.. hahaha....my dad's digicam got stolen so i took pics with my old school camera, film and all.. hahaha.. it was fun.. brought back memories of my grade school grad.. everybody was hugging and kissing in the end..hehehe.. had grad dinner in something fishy... then dessert in jack's loft.. we were all soooooo full when we got home.. i couldn't even think of food anymore..

apr1
woke up at 1pm..went to harm's bday celeb.. stayed 'til midnight to watch her blow the candles on her cake :) apr2 kase bday niya...

apr2
happy birthday harm!!!
i'm home.. i'm sober (newly rehabilitated they say).. and i'm blogging... that's my april 2 so far..

and apr7.. i can't wait.. :) i'll be off to the beach with some friends.. and i'll maintain my 'soberness' thank you very much.. i like it this way.... :)